Monday, August 23, 2010

How to Deal

When the Number of Men Who Have Hit on Your Fiance Surpasses
the Number of Men Who Have Hit on You

1)  Stomp your foot and announce that your cute ass is wasted on this neighborhood.

2)  Contemplate his cute ass and determine that at least the attention is justified.

3)  Encourage him to obtain his clothes from bus stops, gutters, and lost and found boxes.

4)  Determine that you will purchase all his clothes one size larger from now on.  This has been proven effective in preventing attention in countless Lifetime movies and After-School Specials that I have seen.  Oh, and glasses seem to work wonders in this department as well.

5)  Take it as a supreme compliment, and feel a little sorry for the poor guy (or let's face it-guys) who realize he's going home with you.

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